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Laconic

“And by the way, everything in life is writable about if you have the outgoing guts to do it, and the imagination to improvise. The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.” ― Sylvia Plath

Category

Twenties

Singles Jingle (#involuntary singles)

Okay, so if there is one time of year when you truly realise how single you are it is most definitely this month. February. Don’t be silly,don’t tap your ears. I did say February! The most dreaded time of the year for singles.

The instances of making you feel single starts from 31st December by putting ‘stag’ & ‘couple’ entry as a barrier and charging more for the stag entry. Somehow you manage to pull off the situation by sipping in Tuborg or Royal Stag with the singles you find there. Then you try hitting on girls under the covet of being drunk. But then the devil laughs at you. The girl you were trying to get attention of is already consumed in talk with your charming friend,whose professional conversational skills speaks more than your charming face. In the end you get dozed off on the dance floor saying,”Bhai ne dhoka dedia”.

You’re not over from the hangover yet and here comes another missile in the form of notification. You’re constantly nagged by the notification of last night uploads of couples getting cosy under the trance of dance music, gleaming disco balls and laser lights. There is also a picture of the friend who betrayed you and posted his picture with that girl gang you were pounding your eyes upon. God’s swear! It feels like squeezing them ,instead of lemon,to make a portion to become sober.

Then there are them who puts caption such as,” My world, My baby, My year starts with you & ends with you.”Bullshit!
It’s not even been 2 months of their commitment and their partners become their #soulmates #world. These idiots are the ones because of whom the gifts shops like Archies survive. And they’ll be seen shredding tears on your lap when that s/o or d/o a gun will transfer that gift to their manicorn.

That being said the current month is a season of wedding. Oh bro! Already the weather is on its full swing to change into summers, manipulating your testosterone and oestrogen hormone levels, making you a bit amorous, you are tend to attend the functions by your parents. Whereby you almost complete your century of making crushes in one day by seeing the opposite sex dressed up in ethnic outfits. And in case of boys, they dieheartedly fall in love watching girls adjust their lehanga or pallu while eating pani puri.
Unfortunately you just return back home with a feeling of being a professional single and search the venue’s google location,so as to find the crushes you just made which ultimately gets crushed when you couldn’t find them.

The story doesn’t end here. The month is January only known as a month of birthdays. There is always a friend in a group whose birthday falls in January. You are being invited in the party and what you notice is that,there are cute couples (birthday boy’s friend)taking pictures with your birthday boy and posting it with the hashtag “#couplegoals”. They’ll also hand over you the camera to take their picture as you’re the photographer guy who always gets friendzoned but become their best friend in such events.

You’re like WTF! “Couples couples everywhere, but my soul mate is nowhere
“. I’ll not discern such encounters and focus on patriotism as Republic Day is on its verge to come. You start taking interest in school’s cultural events but life doesn’t stop from taking troll on you. You notice puppy love budding up in the name of practices and celebrating their romance in ‘khopchas’ of your school or in rehersal halls by bunking classes. Meanwhile the established couples beg that guy in the class whose house is always empty as his parents are of working class. So in the name of dance practice they do something else’s practice. Ahem ! Ahem!

Ghosh man! The love month hasn’t even started and their temptations are in upsurge. Now you’re completely pissed off from this”hutiyapa” and you start to focus on Exams as pre-boards or annual exams are about to commence. But you guys belongs to the digital era, how come you’ll stop yourself to keep your hands away from the social media apps. And as you login to the apps, you’re flooded with the ‘MEMES’ and ‘write-ups’ which leaves no stone unturned to assert you that BRO! YOU’RE WORLD CLASS SINGLE and go solo to satisfy your needs or else die in a waterpot.

Life gets harder than you go at night.:p
Now you cover up this single pain by putting up stories such as ,”Twinkle twinkle little star, singles are superstars”, or you’ll show the calculations of the amount of money you’re going to save by remaining single which is a pretence of being happy anti your lonliness.

I haven’t even started the description of February month and you already seems to be retiring from reminiscing such encounters you might had. Right?I guess then, we’ll discuss the further part in a next post. Till then embrace your single life by following “Sakht Launda” and swiping right on Tinder.

Don’t forget to mention such encounter of yours in comments and do tag your buddy’s who belongs to the single club.

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“MAYBE”

Maybe I’m always available to you is making my worth dwindle.
Maybe a day will come when you’ll be surrounded by many and I’ll perish.You’ll rejoice the extra attention but regret our ending decision.
Maybe you find a friend in everyone but won’t be able to figure out the foe in that disguise
Maybe you’ll just crave for the one you once had.
Maybe your tears apart from your eyes crying over the part from which you decided to depart.
And maybe the day when you realise all this I’ll already be someone else’s part.
Just hold on these special person’s tight,

So that you don’t have to cry the whole night.

The one who is right,

Shouldn’t escape from your sight.

Don’t find that special one in someone new,

Search in the old and existing

 the gold ones,

Because these persons only come in few.

                                                                                                             ©MUDITDAK

My Pledge

​Maybe at this point of time,

Life’s looking down upon me.

But I’ll fight for my fate

So as to,let the God bestow some mercy on me.

Not due to empathy but consistent efforts.

I’m on my way.

The ones in my way are more than welcomed.

Let your small assess have their places on my path

And clean the filth in front.

Criticizing mouths are also welcomed,

But rather than condemning you all,

I’ll give you an advice that we all are traveling in 

Our time zones with our own pace.

So let it be.

Live your life.

Appreciate the ones who are there in your grief

and are giving you relief.

Also appreciate the criticizers,as they keep you 

Motivated if you perceive it as so.

Just keep a winning attitude,

Even if you are mentally retarded and demotivated,

Just write or recall that you can and you will do it.

Writing positive fits it in your subconscious mind,

And prepare you mentally.

So repeat if you want to make it big someday.

I can.

And I will.

God!Are you even up there?

God gives me so much of pain,

Physically and mentally that,

It makes me vulnerable to self harm till the

Suicidal thoughts come in place.

After which I start pondering over the existence of the god. At First I fear from God and deter any ill words against him inside my soul. On the other hand,simultaneously,some negative words starts budding inside my mind against him.

I cringe to buzz off these voice-overs but they do not tend to leave until I start shedding tears.

Let me brief you something about the musings that goes inside my head in this abyss.I know why I fear ill words against him.Because conventional parenting has inhabited such customs in me which does not let me speak anything bad to god otherwise I would be consistently and continuously be discomforted by the almighty through the tick and tricks from inside his duffel. As per the traditional notions any ill intention against him will destroy us completely.

I don’t believe in this. If there’s any power named God, I think he would be mature enough to let his preacher’s mistakes go. He might have bigger fishers to fry rather than being involved in a punishment game like teachers play in school. He should rather be putting hault on crimes,make a public beneficiary government, eradicate poverty,stop sexual assault,end someone’s health misery,and stop anything determinant to good humans and animals well being,in my opinion.

The other thing which is going inside my head is a lead to the knowledge prompted by reading self-help books which says that there is just one god that is you,believe in power of faith,your subconscious mind is the key to achieve everything and all that about self realization. In simple words,my mind doesn’t believe in God some times and these voices starts taking over when I’m really frustrated and blame GOD for everything bad happening to me.

 

Introvert say on trust

Never trust anyone,whether it’s your bff,friend,partner,colleague or any fellow in your group.Nowadays people have become hypocrite.They don’t mean what they say.I mean why do you give someone a false hope,when in the end your actions are going to be overturned.Its ridiculous.Generalising this idea onto everyone may seem harsh or offensive but you’ve to accept it.But you’ll obviously disaccord with this statement untill someone has turned their back on you.Many people will also say,its not like, if you’ve been cheated by someone at any point of your life or your trust was broken by the close one’s,you prejudice a negative image for everyone.And that’s true also to many extent.But for an introvert the case is different.
They value people,they value their words.So it’s hard for them.So they resort to a nice place to comfy,away from the negative vibes that dwell within the surrounding people, in solitude.Sitting in the corner with a phone in hands,listening music,watching every activity of their social media friends,inquisitive to talk to someone but scared of the consequence they may face later if they create a bonding.They drop that idea and then logout. They stay away from the affection that they somewhere long.As they know the agony of expections.So should everyone.

Clueless

​I’ll get back at the world,

I considered as Mine.

As there remain no people,

Who once made my world shine.

I felt loved when I was in their count,

But they made me realise I was just an avenue to

Kill time.

Its true that there lies a piece in solace.

Yet it becomes pain in the ass to be there,

When there are no other choices.

Certainly,to be left alone was not out of my choice,

It was my only option left.

Time and Tide wait for none

And it’s inside me,the hooligan 

Who don’t want to be shun.

And it’s me caught up between benevolence & spite,

Hurt up to the eternity,

Yet finding way to define how much

I want all of ’em back to justify.

Its a side-effect of the fervent feelings dig deep inside,

That this bug is not letting the retrospection fly.

Clueless as to say whether I want to babble about 

How I miss those Betrayers who abandoned me 

Or about an internal rage that is budding inside me against

the affection & ardent feeling that comes my way through

Any new way.

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